“What really knocks me out is a book that, when you're all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrific friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it. That doesn't happen much, though.”
“Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.”
“Among other things, you'll find that you're not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You're by no means alone on that score, you'll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You'll learn from them—if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It's a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry.”
“I'm sick of just liking people. I wish to God I could meet somebody I could respect.”
“Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around - nobody big, I mean - except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be.”
“I am always saying "Glad to've met you" to somebody I'm not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though.”
“That's the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty, even if they're not much to look at, or even if they're sort of stupid, you fall in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are. Girls. Jesus Christ. They can drive you crazy. They really can.”
“Mothers are all slightly insane.”
“I like it when somebody gets excited about something. It's nice.”
“It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to.”
“I'm sick of not having the courage to be an absolute nobody.”
“When you're dead, they really fix you up. I hope to hell when I do die somebody has sense enough to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddam cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody.”
“And I have one of those very loud, stupid laughs. I mean if I ever sat behind myself in a movie or something, I'd probably lean over and tell myself to please shut up.”
“The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one.”
“Certain things, they should stay the way they are. You ought to be able to stick them in one of those big glass cases and just leave them alone.”
“I don't exactly know what I mean by that, but I mean it.”
“People are always ruining things for you.”
“I’m just sick of ego, ego, ego. My own and everybody else’s. I’m sick of everybody that wants to get somewhere, do something distinguished and all, be somebody interesting. It’s disgusting.”
“when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write "Fuck you" right under your nose.”
“I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be. I know it's crazy.”
“I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. If I'm on my way to the store to buy a magazine, even, and somebody asks me where I'm going, I'm liable to say I'm going to the opera. It's terrible.”
“All morons hate it when you call them a moron.”
“If a girl looks swell when she meets you, who gives a damn if she's late?”
“People never notice anything.”
“I'm quite illiterate, but I read a lot. ”
―
“I'm a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy.”
“People always clap for the wrong reasons.”
“And I can't be running back and fourth forever between grief and high delight.”
“An artist's only concern is to shoot for some kind of perfection, and on his own terms, not anyone else's.”
“It's everybody, I mean. Everything everybody does is so — I don't know — not wrong, or even mean, or even stupid necessarily. But just so tiny and meaningless and — sad-making. And the worst part is, if you go bohemian or something crazy like that, you're conforming just as much only in a different way.”
“I was trying to feel some kind of good-bye. I mean I’ve left schools and places I didn’t even know I was leaving them. I hate that. I don’t care if it’s a sad good-bye or a bad good-bye, but when I leave a place I like to know I’m leaving it. If you don’t you feel even worse.”
“If you do something too good, then, after a while, if you don't watch it, you start showing off. And then you're not as good any more.”
“Grand. There's a word I really hate. It's a phony. I could puke every time I hear it.”
“The fact is always obvious much too late, but the most singular difference between happiness and joy is that happiness is a solid and joy a liquid.”
“She wasn't doing a thing that I could see, except standing there leaning on the balcony railing, holding the universe together.”
“It was that kind of a crazy afternoon, terrifically cold, and no sun out or anything, and you felt like you were disappearing every time you crossed a road.”
“Almost every time somebody gives me a present, it ends up making me sad.”
“If you had a million years to do it in, you couldn't rub out even half the "Fuck you" signs in the world. It's impossible.”
“I love you to pieces, distraction, etc.”
“I can be quite sarcastic when I'm in the mood.”
“Goddam money. It always ends up making you blue as hell.”
“I don't know what good it is to know so much and be smart as whips and all if it doesn't make you happy.”
“Poets are always taking the weather so personally. They're always sticking their emotions in things that have no emotions.”
“Sleep tight, ya morons!”
“I used to think she was quite intelligent , in my stupidity. The reason I did was because she knew quite a lot about the theater and plays and literature and all that stuff. If somebody knows quite a lot about all those things, it takes you quite a while to find out whether they're really stupid or not.”
“I think that one of these days," he said, "you're going to have to find out where you want to go. And then you've got to start going there. But immediately. You can't afford to lose a minute. Not you.”
“This fall I think you're riding for—it's a special kind of fall, a horrible kind. The man falling isn't permitted to feel or hear himself hit bottom. He just keeps falling and falling. The whole arrangement's designed for men who, at some time or other in their lives, were looking for something their own environment couldn't supply them with. Or they thought their own environment couldn't supply them with. So they gave up looking. They gave it up before they ever really even got started.”
“I can’t explain what I mean. And even if I could, I’m not sure I’d feel like it.”
“It's partly true, too, but it isn't all true. People always think something's all true.”
“Ask her if she still keeps all her kings in the back row.”
“Life is a game, boy. Life is a game that one plays according to the rule."
Yes, sir. I know it is. I know it."
Game, my ass. Some game. If you get on the side where all the hot-shots are, then it's a game, all right-I'll admit that. But if you get on the other side, where there aren't any hot-shots, then what's a game about it? Nothing. No game.”
“Make sure you marry someone who laughs at the same things you do.”
“You don't know how to talk to people you don't like. Don't love, really. You can't live in the world with such strong likes and dislikes.”
“This is a people shooting hat," I said. "I shoot people in this hat.”
“I don’t give a damn, except that I get bored sometimes when people tell me to act my age. Sometimes I act a lot older than I am - I really do - but people never notice it. People never notice anything.”
“I think, even, if I ever die, and they stick me in a cemetery, and I have a tombstone and all, it'll say 'Holden Caulfield' on it, and then what year I was born and what year I died, and then right under that it'll say 'Fuck you.' I'm positive, in fact.”
“It's not too bad when the sun's out, but the sun only comes out when it feels like coming out.”
“I have scars on my hands from touching certain people…Certain heads, certain colours and textures of human hair leave permanent marks on me.”
“People always clap for the wrong things.”
“Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.”
“Among other things, you'll find that you're not the first person who was ever confused and frightened and even sickened by human behavior. You're by no means alone on that score, you'll be excited and stimulated to know. Many, many men have been just as troubled morally and spiritually as you are right now. Happily, some of them kept records of their troubles. You'll learn from them—if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It's a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry.”
“I'm sick of just liking people. I wish to God I could meet somebody I could respect.”
“Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around - nobody big, I mean - except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be.”
“I am always saying "Glad to've met you" to somebody I'm not at all glad I met. If you want to stay alive, you have to say that stuff, though.”
“That's the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty, even if they're not much to look at, or even if they're sort of stupid, you fall in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are. Girls. Jesus Christ. They can drive you crazy. They really can.”
“Mothers are all slightly insane.”
“I like it when somebody gets excited about something. It's nice.”
“It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to.”
“I'm sick of not having the courage to be an absolute nobody.”
“When you're dead, they really fix you up. I hope to hell when I do die somebody has sense enough to just dump me in the river or something. Anything except sticking me in a goddam cemetery. People coming and putting a bunch of flowers on your stomach on Sunday, and all that crap. Who wants flowers when you're dead? Nobody.”
“And I have one of those very loud, stupid laughs. I mean if I ever sat behind myself in a movie or something, I'd probably lean over and tell myself to please shut up.”
“The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one.”
“Certain things, they should stay the way they are. You ought to be able to stick them in one of those big glass cases and just leave them alone.”
“I don't exactly know what I mean by that, but I mean it.”
“People are always ruining things for you.”
“I’m just sick of ego, ego, ego. My own and everybody else’s. I’m sick of everybody that wants to get somewhere, do something distinguished and all, be somebody interesting. It’s disgusting.”
“when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write "Fuck you" right under your nose.”
“I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be. I know it's crazy.”
“I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. If I'm on my way to the store to buy a magazine, even, and somebody asks me where I'm going, I'm liable to say I'm going to the opera. It's terrible.”
“All morons hate it when you call them a moron.”
“If a girl looks swell when she meets you, who gives a damn if she's late?”
“People never notice anything.”
“I'm quite illiterate, but I read a lot. ”
―
“I'm a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy.”
“People always clap for the wrong reasons.”
“And I can't be running back and fourth forever between grief and high delight.”
“An artist's only concern is to shoot for some kind of perfection, and on his own terms, not anyone else's.”
“It's everybody, I mean. Everything everybody does is so — I don't know — not wrong, or even mean, or even stupid necessarily. But just so tiny and meaningless and — sad-making. And the worst part is, if you go bohemian or something crazy like that, you're conforming just as much only in a different way.”
“I was trying to feel some kind of good-bye. I mean I’ve left schools and places I didn’t even know I was leaving them. I hate that. I don’t care if it’s a sad good-bye or a bad good-bye, but when I leave a place I like to know I’m leaving it. If you don’t you feel even worse.”
“If you do something too good, then, after a while, if you don't watch it, you start showing off. And then you're not as good any more.”
“Grand. There's a word I really hate. It's a phony. I could puke every time I hear it.”
“The fact is always obvious much too late, but the most singular difference between happiness and joy is that happiness is a solid and joy a liquid.”
“She wasn't doing a thing that I could see, except standing there leaning on the balcony railing, holding the universe together.”
“It was that kind of a crazy afternoon, terrifically cold, and no sun out or anything, and you felt like you were disappearing every time you crossed a road.”
“Almost every time somebody gives me a present, it ends up making me sad.”
“If you had a million years to do it in, you couldn't rub out even half the "Fuck you" signs in the world. It's impossible.”
“I love you to pieces, distraction, etc.”
“I can be quite sarcastic when I'm in the mood.”
“Goddam money. It always ends up making you blue as hell.”
“I don't know what good it is to know so much and be smart as whips and all if it doesn't make you happy.”
“Poets are always taking the weather so personally. They're always sticking their emotions in things that have no emotions.”
“Sleep tight, ya morons!”
“I used to think she was quite intelligent , in my stupidity. The reason I did was because she knew quite a lot about the theater and plays and literature and all that stuff. If somebody knows quite a lot about all those things, it takes you quite a while to find out whether they're really stupid or not.”
“I think that one of these days," he said, "you're going to have to find out where you want to go. And then you've got to start going there. But immediately. You can't afford to lose a minute. Not you.”
“This fall I think you're riding for—it's a special kind of fall, a horrible kind. The man falling isn't permitted to feel or hear himself hit bottom. He just keeps falling and falling. The whole arrangement's designed for men who, at some time or other in their lives, were looking for something their own environment couldn't supply them with. Or they thought their own environment couldn't supply them with. So they gave up looking. They gave it up before they ever really even got started.”
“I can’t explain what I mean. And even if I could, I’m not sure I’d feel like it.”
“It's partly true, too, but it isn't all true. People always think something's all true.”
“Ask her if she still keeps all her kings in the back row.”
“Life is a game, boy. Life is a game that one plays according to the rule."
Yes, sir. I know it is. I know it."
Game, my ass. Some game. If you get on the side where all the hot-shots are, then it's a game, all right-I'll admit that. But if you get on the other side, where there aren't any hot-shots, then what's a game about it? Nothing. No game.”
“Make sure you marry someone who laughs at the same things you do.”
“You don't know how to talk to people you don't like. Don't love, really. You can't live in the world with such strong likes and dislikes.”
“This is a people shooting hat," I said. "I shoot people in this hat.”
“I don’t give a damn, except that I get bored sometimes when people tell me to act my age. Sometimes I act a lot older than I am - I really do - but people never notice it. People never notice anything.”
“I think, even, if I ever die, and they stick me in a cemetery, and I have a tombstone and all, it'll say 'Holden Caulfield' on it, and then what year I was born and what year I died, and then right under that it'll say 'Fuck you.' I'm positive, in fact.”
“It's not too bad when the sun's out, but the sun only comes out when it feels like coming out.”
“I have scars on my hands from touching certain people…Certain heads, certain colours and textures of human hair leave permanent marks on me.”
“People always clap for the wrong things.”
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